UNIVERSITY OF CALYPSO | Transcriptions and song notes by Michael Oliver-Goodwin
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Ugly Woman
One of Relator's most amazing talents is that in addition to writing and singing his own great songs, he is probably the best interpreter of other people's calypsos in Trinidad. The early calypso master Roaring Lion (real name Rafael de Leon; 1908-1999) recorded "Ugly Woman" in 1934, and it quickly became one of the most popular calypsos in the world. Sir Lancelot sang it in the Hollywood musical Happy Go Lucky (1943). The Duke of Iron and MacBeth the Great covered it as well. In the early 1950s, the Mighty Charmer (real name Louis Farrakhan) cut a version. As did Robert Mitchum!
If you want to be happy and live a king's life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
If you want to be happy and live a king's life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
All you have to do is hear what I say
An' you will be jolly, merry and gay
Therefore from a logical point of view
Always marry a woman uglier than you.
A pretty woman makes her husband look small
And very often cause his downfall
From the time she marries there and then she'll start
To do the things that will break his heart
And when you really think she belongs to you
She callin' somebody else honeydew
Therefore from a logical point of view
Always marry a woman uglier than you.
An ugly woman gives you your meals on time
And very often a peace of mind
At nights when you're lying in your cozy bed
She will kiss, caress you and scratch your head
She will never embarrass you at all
By exhibiting herself to Peter and Paul
Therefore from a logical point of view
Always marry a woman uglier than you.